In Case Of Rapture.

Since some dude states the Rapture of Christ's church will happen tomorrow May 21st 2011, I felt it was necessary to let those who might still be here gain access to some information and materials if my family and I are gone.

  • I will leave the key to my house under the door mat.  It's best if you get here as soon as you can because we live in the ghetto and I'm sure the middle schoolers will form a mob and loot the homes in the area.
  • Passwords to our laptops will be on post it notes on our respective computers.  Mine is a work computer so you might want to be careful.
  • The shotgun is in the gun safe in the utility room.  The combination will be on the safe door.
  • I've left the bag of dog food outside for Happy.  Make sure she has water and shoo the birds away who try to eat her food.
  • Please do not judge us for the amount of clothes we've left unfolded on the couch.
  • The dishes in the dishwasher may not be clean.
  • There may be clothes in the washer still.  You might want to put it in the dryer so it does not mildew.
  • Saturday will be the last day of the pay week, it means I should get paid.  The money should be in my account on Thursday.  Be sure you get it before Well Fargo takes out the mortgage payment.
  • Going into MaddSkillz room will make you think we've already been looted.  Rest assured it is just the normal appearance of his room.
  • There's left overs in the fridge.  Eat those first.
  • And can you please mail my Green Lantern winners their packages?  I haven't been to the post office yet.
Everything else is open game for you or the looters.

If the rapture doesn't happen the above accommodations are void and invalid.   Now if the rapture DOES happen and we're still here, all bets are off and I'll be sitting behind my front door with the shotgun you lousy looters.