Perfection vs. Reality: Getting Ready for School

In my head, weekday mornings should go something like this....

5:20 - 5:30: Eric gets up with the intent on getting a jump start on the day whether it's reading, showering, anything to get him going.

6:00: Go in to the kids' room quietly to wake up Ladybug to begin getting ready for school.

6:07 - 6:15: Because Eric already has her clothes picked out, ironed and she listens to everything he says, she gets dressed without incident.  After she's dressed, her hair is brushed.

6:15: Since she has the option to eat breakfast at school, she chooses to eat breakfast there, brushes her teeth, takes any medicines and vitamins she requires,  flips on SpongeBob and just chills until it's time to go to the bus stop.

6:20: Eric goes to his bedroom to awaken Kristie.  He tells her Ladybug is ready to go and since he's done early he's going to go ahead and log into work to get an hour of overtime.  KC smiles but suggests since he's done early that they make out for ten minutes.

6:20 - 6:30: Cool.

6:30: Eric smiles as he logs into work.

6:45: MaddSkillz wakes up.

6:57: Ladybug puts on her backpack with all her homework and paperwork we've signed and heads out to the bus stop with MaddSkillz.

Sounds pretty reasonable right?

Well in actuality, it goes more like this.....

5:20: Alarm goes off... SNOOZE

5:27: Alarm goes off... SNOOZE

5:34 - 5:55: Alarm goes off... SNOOZE (x4)

6:02: Alarm goes off and Eric jumps out of bed.  He realizes that Ladybug is already in his bed, wakes her up and tip-toes out of his room not to wake up Emsters.

6:03:  Celi wakes up screaming. Eric rushes into the room before she wakes up Disco.

6:04: Emsters wakes up because Eric didn't turn off the baby monitor in his room and Celi screaming woke her up.

6:06: In the midst of changing diapers, Disco walks out of the room letting his dad know he's hungry.  Turns out he's also soaking wet because the cheap Target diapers we bought are far from absorbent.

6:06: Celi realizes she is hungry too.

6:06: Emsters been crying for three minutes because she's hungry too.

6:07:  Finding the least winkled clothes from clean laundry pile, Eric gives Ladybug her only option.

6:08 - 6:20: Doesn't like the clothes her dad picked out.  The pant legs are too long.  The socks are too big.  The socks are too small.  The 3/4 length sleeve doesn't cover her entire arm.

6:20:  Knowing that she probably didn't get a good sleep last night since Ladybug used her mad stealth skills to enter our bed, Eric has to call in for backup.

6:22 - 6:27:  Finally able to get to Disco and his pee soaked clothes, Eric has to give him an emergency bath while KC convinces Ladybug at least ninety-seven times to let her brush her hair.

6:25:  The dogs managed to escape from the backyard.

6:30:  Ladybug says she will eat at school, KC searches for a clean fork and plate but can't find one because MaddSkillz didn't wash dishes last night, makes breakfast for Disco and Celi, puts Emsters in her high chair and gives her a bottle.

6:30 - 6:40:  Eric is in the backyard trying to block the gate with various objects to keep the dogs in.

6:42:  Ladybug changes her mind and says she will eat breakfast at home.

6:42 - 6:47:  More searching for clean dishes and making Ladybug's breakfast.

6:48 - 6:54:  Ladybug scarfs down her breakfast.

6:55:  Where's MaddSkillz?  We open his door to the blaring sound of his alarm going off next to his head with him completely unaware.

6:56:  Realize we forgot to sign Ladybug's folders and put them back in her backpack.

6:58 - 7:01:  Eric takes Ladybug to the bus stop.  Ladybug remembers she did not take her vitamin, medicine or brush her teeth.

7:01:  The dogs are out again, but are present to tell Ladybug goodbye.

7:05 - 7:15:  Attempts to block the hole in the gate with something else.  If it doesn't work he'll just shoot them.

7:17:  MaddSkillz comes out of his room asking if we took Ladybug to the bus stop.

7:20:  With everything seemingly taken care of and 10 minutes before he really has to log into work, he asks KC if she wants to make out for ten minutes.  She refuses citing she's tired and frustrated and also including that even if she wasn't, Eric hasn't shaved in over a week and he still has that cold sore.

7:20 - 7:30: Not cool.

7:30:  Eric logs into work with a frown.

So what about your mornings??  Are they perfect?  Closer to reality with multiple children or somewhere in the middle??

Have a great week my friends.