Pre-School MMA Academy - NOW ENROLLING!

This was a pretty lazy weekend. The van is still on gimp squad because no one in the world is carrying the rear brake calipers for a 2008 Dodge Grand Caravan. So, I just chilled at home brushing up on my DVR'd shows and working a few hours of OT.

You would think that the highlight of the weekend would be that my baby baby girl took a couple steps by herself. But I have to disagree. The big thing this weekend was that I realized that my children have the potential to be Ultimate Fighters.

Let me explain.

Ladybug Lightning

One night I was working in the kitchen. I heard that there was a commotion. It was coming mainly from the wife wanting me to come see what was going on.

Here's the scene: My three (almost four) year old daughter and my 22 month old son are in their sister's playpen. Apparently they were having a wrestling match where Disco was doing the JOB (losing). I'm not sure how much ring psychology happened up until this point or what move she hit to get him on his stomach, but Ladybug was applying the Camel Clutch/Steiner Recliner on her little brother in an attempt to make him tap out. But Disco was resilient, it did not even look like he was even sweating and was not going to tap out any time soon.

I enjoyed the picture for a few more moments and then broke it up as the fans in the arena started booing me. I then had to do my parental duty and tell her that she only Nacho Libre can wrestle.And the bible says, "Not to wrestle your brother.." I then followed it up with.. "Go on!!! Read some books!!!"

The Tazmanian Beauty

Our 9 month old has been quite for the past 9.5 months of her existence. She would sit and just watch everyone, she would play with herself and her toys and the wife and I priased her for being a "good kid." But what Beautiful had been doing her entire life was taking notes. She had been watching and learning our weaknesses.

She has learned how to shove her older sister out of the way for a toy. She has gotten tazmanian devil as well when something is taken away from her. She has also realized that she can physically cause pain by scratching Daddy's face and by putting her finger up my nose. Now I'm no Kimbo Slice. I can usually hold my own against Infants and Toddlers. But the research she has done to pinpoint our weaknesses is amazing.

The Disco Ninja

Last night I was again, working in the kitchen. My youngest son was out with his Nana and missed dinner with the family. Nana had cut him up some of the food she picked up and set him down at the Dora table.

A little while later I hear this coming from his direction..

"Shaaaw… Shaaaw.. Wishaww… Shaaw Shaw Wishawww!!"

I look over and he is holding his spoon in one hand and a plastic butter knife in the other. And alternating forward thrusts are accompanying the "shaws".

Forward thrust spoon.. "SHAAAW!!!"

Forward thrust butter knife.. "WISHAWW!!"

Again, I had to hold back my excitement as he was practicing his ninja skills without being told too. I asked the rhetorical question about who let him have the butter knife. But secretly thinking of my plan for starting my own Pre-School MMA Academy with my children's faces on the banner.

Now, I know that inevitably that all of this rough housing is going to all be blamed on me. I let them watch Nacho Libre. I let them watch TMNT. But you know what?!? I'm cool that my kids recognize GiJoe and Transformers when a commercial comes on.

But you know what?!?!?

If they watched her movies (Legally Blonde, Mary Poppins), they would get their butts handed to them in Pre-School MMA Academy with moves like the Bend and Snap and The Chimney Sweep Dance.

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  1. I would hate to be the guy who mistakenly breaks into your house...

  2. Kids are so entertaining, aren't they? They are so carefree. Sometimes, I wish I could be a kid again.

  3. Napoleon Pillowpart, that was the day Junior broke into spontaneous song with a pillow on his head and a determination to conquer the living room - love it when they act, well, entertaining!


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