What to Expect in Fantasy Football This Year.

It's that time of year again.  It's time for Fantasy Football.  It's the time of year where I try to pretend I should have a man card by attempting to act like I know what I'm doing.

But the thing is, I have no clue as to what I'm doing.

I originally saw KC's uncle was scouting for a league, so I asked if I could take a spot in order to come across as manly.  I was invited but found out they have actual Draft Parties and you have to do homework.

Aw Hell Naw!!!

I'm more of the, "let the system automatically pick the crappiest team for me" type of guy.  So I went to the league my brother has that requires less commitment.

This weekend is the start of the season and the start of the sham I put forth when attempting to play Fantasy Football with my brother's league.


  • I will have a team filled with players I do not know and maybe a couple of whom I know.  In this season's case it's Drew Brees and Tony Romo.
  • Drew Brees will have his worst season ever.
  • Tony Romo will be injured.
  • I have Nate Kaeding (Kicker) for the third season in a row and I still have no idea who the heck he is.
  • I will win two of the first four games and then go on a eight game losing streak.
  • Half my defense will be involved in some sort of scandal of sending dirty pictures to underage girls.
  • No matter who I have on my bench they will score more points than my active players.
  • The league I'm in will have my brother and his friends name their teams the most douche baggery names ever.  
  • My brother will call Tony Romo, "Tony Homo" at least ninety-seven times this season.
  • The same brother will call the Cowboys, "the Cowgirls".
  • He'll also think the Texans have a chance at anything.
  • My team after the first three games of the losing streak will be left to fend for themselves while I abandon them.
  • The pile of crap which is my team will be salvaged and picked apart by the other teams requesting trades with guys I am not utilizing.
We'll see in 12 weeks how much of this is correct.

Have a great day my friends.