Don't Make Me Angry....

After the post from Tuesday where I discussed how I felt about going back to work after a month. I'm back working home the next day and became a big hypocrite.

I had been up a good deal of the night with Em and or Beautiful. KC and I got very little sleep that night. I pulled up to my laptop at 6AM to begin working. Like clockwork, the other kids got up at 6:20.

Ugh.

Then they started fighting at 6:22.

Ugh.

They would continue to fight and pick and cry and yell and scream and throw and hit and pull and climb and EVERYTHING for the next four hours.

Couple that with the lack of sleep and the stress of work and Daddy has his breaking point.

I leaped over gate and yelled..

"THAT'S ENOUGH!! I'M TIRED OF THE FIGHTING!!!"

I was Hulk mad.

All three got scared and started crying. Hulk lowered Hulk's voice and tried to be firm by explaining why they shouldn't continue going down the same annoying path they were on.

Yeah it wasn't working. Hulk could have said that we were getting a Wii, but all they could hear was the huffing and heaving breathing of a big green gamma radiated monster. They were scared and confused.

Ladybug started crying for Momma.

The Hulk's breathing got slower and slower. Hulk started shrinking. Daddy was back with his head hanging low.

Here I was yelling at a 4, 2 and 1 year old.

It was lunch time and Ladybug was still hiding behind her bangs.

So I sat her down and I apologized to her for scaring her. I said I was sorry that I was mean and yelled. I told her that no matter what she did, it was no reason for me to act that way to her and her siblings. I said I was sorry and asked her to forgive me.

She said she did and we hugged.

She was back to normal afterwards.

KC was at the doctor and had Emma with her. I talked to her and let her know what happened. She wasn't mad because it happens sometimes with her as well.

Here I thought I was the only one that had been exposed to Gamma radiation in my house.

I am under a constant microscope with everything I do in front of my kids. My good habits and my bad traits. I know what I did was not called for. I know that even though there are probably underlining issues with self worth at work and anxiety involved, it was still not warranted for me to get enraged the way I did to my children.

When they are looking over the specimen slides of their dad's life, I pray they choose not to follow how I reacted but how I corrected the situation.